Apple And Google To Marry?

Following the great successes achieved by SuperPACs so far in the Republican primaries, and building on the Supreme Court’s ruling that “Corporations are people”, our Court Correspondent informed us this morning that there is a very strong rumor that Apple Inc. And Google Inc. are about to marry. Apple is changing its name to Miss Apple and Google has adopted the name Mister Google to simplify the paperwork. They have decided that their married names will be Mr. and Ms. Apple-Google.

Although there are rumors that the courting couple has had its fair share of tiffs over the past few years, both families believe that the tax benefits that they will enjoy as a married couple far outweigh the downside. Their net worth will be in excess of $420 Billion, making them the wealthiest couple in America. Although coy about the future, Miss Apple and Mr. Google didn’t rule out a future husband and wife run for the Oval Office in 2016, or perhaps even as early as 2012. “After all,” they said, “we wouldn’t want those nasty Koch brothers in there, would we?”